Living with Diabetes

I recently got this comment from a fellow diabetic who was recently diagnosed. I think he was trying to understand why the early onslaught. I remember being in there myself. I kept questioning why I would become diabetic this early in life. Was it - - The stress of work and marriage - Being Overweight - Lack of exercise - Too much of a sweet tooth - Too much beer - Smoking......... and so many more. Eventually I came to realize that these are all things that helped being the inevitable on earlier than what it would come on otherwise. There is no one way to get diabetes. If there was then someone could just say. eat so many sweets that they become diabetic. This is not true. You see hundreds of people around you abusing sugar, becoming obese but they are suffering from the diseases. I think genetic plays a hand here and the rest of the environment stuff will help to hinder an early onslaught.

I cannot believe that it has been 5 years since I have been diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes. So many things have happened since then. I feel like I have gone through a roller coaster of emotions and treatments. Though while I was going through them they did not seem this crazy. I have often thought about Diabetes as being a learning exercise. After 5 years of learning the basics, I think now I am going in for the Kindergarden stage. Now some more building blocks will be put in. I plan on reading up a lot more about the disease and maybe get involved a little bit on the science behind the suffering.

Last night I was having a discussion with my wife and the initial years of eating large amounts of meat came about. So in the night as I stayed awake thinking about a lot of stuff, I imagined how cool it would be to be a bystander and watch my own life with diabetes. Would it not be cool if I could just sit outside and watch me make the odd decisions that I did take. I wonder if I would think that this person is making silly mistakes but is getting things in control as he moves forward, or will I be frusterated that this person is just not learning and keeps making the same mistakes over and over again. Will I be judging myself from the sidelines and saying this guy is not going to last that long... Make you wonder how the rest of world on the sidelines is looking at you and what they are thinking .... Think about it.... Maybe the lesson is to be careful in judging others when we ourselves are on their sidelines...

I have been working on making changes to turn back into a positive leaf but it is a harder puzzle than I had ever expected. Last week I am working hard to just not act out on the negative impulse. But that is really not much of a progress. The trick is to fill the head with the positive thoughts. Not sure if it will just hit me like a lightening bolt and I will change or is this something I can train my brain to do. Nothing is clear in this mess of muddy waters. But I will think positively. I am telling myself that it is a process and I will be able to achieve it. Just needs lots of patience, lots of practice and a good sense of humor.